Monday, July 27, 2020

I Kept a Secret

It was hard to blog this spring because I was keeping a big secret.

We had matched with a birth mother at the end of February and were not so patiently awaiting the birth of our son. I was terrified I would jinx us if too many people knew, so I kept it to a minimal number of people.

At the end of May, the birth mother asked me if I would be her only support person in the hospital, because due to the Covid-19 hospital restrictions, she could only have one person. I was nervous and excited and instantly became a ball of anxiety.

We got word that she was scheduled to be induced on May 30, so we decided to go down on May 25 so we would be local if she went into labor earlier than that.

On May 28, we met her for pizza. Chris got to meet her and we had a really nice evening with her. Then, on May 30, I met her at the hospital and we settled in for a long stay. They didn't start the induction medicine until midnight and then things were just rough. Labor didn't progress well. Even after they broke her water on June 1 at 10 AM, she still didn't dilate past 5 centimeters.

By 10 PM on June 1, the birth mother spiked a fever and the baby was struggling through each contraction, so they started talking to her about a C-section. It was an emotional and overwhelming night, but she eventually agreed to do the C-section and our beautiful, big son was born after 2 AM on June 2.

Because she had a C-section, we decided to get separate hospital rooms and I spent the next 2 1/2 days taking care of this new, scary, cuddly, beautiful, little boy.

On June 4, my husband picked us up from the hospital and we met with the social worker to finish our paperwork and then took Bash "home" to our AirBnB.

We returned home on Father's Day and have been settling into life as a family of 3 (plus Ellie) since then.

I hated keeping this secret. It was so hard to write when I couldn't be authentic and share what was going on with me. So, here we are...Bash is almost 2 months old and I am figuring out how to keep a clean house and do things I like to do, like post on Instagram and here on the blog and work with my travel agency business, while doting on this little gift.